Basketball is an escape; it always has been, it always will be. The second I walk inside an arena, a gym, a basketball court in a church- step onto an outdoor court at a park- I can turn off my brain and focus on just one thing, 94 feet of hardwood. The Providence College Friars have been my team as long as I can remember. I vividly have flashbacks of waiting outside of some event, a family gathering, a high school game (my father was the stand in athletic director where he taught often) in my dad’s red Buick in the 90’s, listening to John and Joe call a Friar game on the radio before we went inside somewhere, knowing the end result was just as important as the place we needed to be.
I’ll be the first to admit, I wasn’t very good. That never stopped me from wanting to understand it- to consume as much information in my brain as I could about the game. I started coaching middle school basketball out of college and have been luck to stay involved with the game at the AAU and HS level for 10+ years now. It’s more than just basketball- its relationships, bonds, being there for someone- the hoops is the easy part.
There is nothing like diving into a game plan, watching film, running practice, being around your guys. The game teaches you so much more than just scoring the ball. It’s the best distraction in the world (highly opinionated take here). The Friars, and the game will always be my first outlet for that. Walking into the Civic center, the Dunk, or now the AMP there is not a singular better feeling than turning your brain off to the outside world and putting yourself in the right mindset for what could take place over the next two hours. Sure, the camaraderie with your buddies, a few beers (sometimes more than a few but who’s counting) is great, but what has the coach cooked up this week? What is the staff planning to take away? What is staff going to exploit, how does the staff get the ball into the hands of its play makers knowing the opposition is scheming the same thing. There’s an endless number of thoughts that go through your head (maybe just my sick head) regarding the game – and in just a short time, the ball is tipped (shoutout One Shining Moment), and you’ll get to see it all play out in real time.
Basketball, man, it’s the best.
What Ed Cooley did to bring that distraction here cannot be understated. I’m not going to deny that sentiment. He did it with Passion and Purpose. He created a FAMILY type atmosphere for the program and city. He preached that every day and he sold that message day in and day out. He was one of us, a local, a lifer, a hooper, a kid from down the street. It was his dream job, he’d been courted before, they couldn’t take him away from his hood. Sure, would any of us blame him for taking a job like Duke? Or North Carolina- no, that’s one thing. This… this situation was unimaginable.
So why does this all matter? Why are we truly angry he left (regardless of the rumor mill circumstances that are floating around)? It matters most to me because basketball as I previously mentioned is that escape. It’s that escape from a bad day, from stress, or to avoid having to face whatever it is you must overcome. In February of 2023 my father became ill, and the unfortunate circumstances around his illness were pointing to a quick, and sudden death.
I needed basketball, I needed the Friars. I needed the late February into March run to get me through something. Instead, I got a double dose of disappointment in my life. I was taking uppercuts on a weekly basis, and I needed to walk into the AMP for 2 hours of solace. I needed to be able to turn to basketball, so I could turn my brain off from the outside world for just 2 hours. I couldn’t. The rumors were clearly happening before our eyes, and by the time the Friars took the floor for senior day at the AMP in early March the season was cooked.
My father passed away on March 9th. I needed basketball. I couldn’t have basketball. The Friars took a right hook just like me, and by the hands of UConn to add insult to injury. I needed to escape. I couldn’t. Our coach was on his way to Georgetown, and he could not provide that 2 hour of solace to anyone.
I’m the eternal basketball optimist; any given day, on any given court. We had Ed Cooley on our sidelines. That man has preached his competitiveness, a few rumors were not going to derail an NCAA tournament run! I traveled from South Carolina shortly after my fathers passing up to North Carolina to meet my Friar family, to escape, to turn off my brain. Sure, in the moment, you think you can turn your brain off, get behind the team, but the feeling I had that day in the hotel lobby awaiting to send the Friars off to the game, you just knew, you could feel it, something was off, something was wrong, – you can’t turn your brain off to it, no matter how hard you try.
This boils down to one simple thing- things are bigger than basketball, and in my case, basketball is what allows those bigger things to be pushed down and dealt with later. The Friars were my way of escaping they always have been- and certainly always will be, and when I needed the Friars the most the head coach was already working for a team not in my hood. I’m not mad he left for “a better job”- any of us with half a brain and know the inner workings of college basketball know you don’t do what he did.
Lots of people have reasons to feel betrayed- mine is just one example. What happened Saturday was 10-11 months of built-up anger, frustration, and sadness for some of us. I’m not going to tell you mine is more justifiable than yours, I’m just going to tell you why some of us have felt the way we do over the past few months.
If you told me this time last year, a year from now you’ll get to turn off your brain for two hours thanks to Ed Cooley I’d have never doubted it, I just would have doubted the circumstances!
Mindset